We all have our reasons...
why kids aren't invited to the wedding, why we don't want any alcohol present...even if guests are willing and eager to pay for it, why we chose a buffet over a plated meal, or why some old friends just didn't make the cut.
We have our reasons for each and every decision we make for our wedding day and most of the time, it's an impossible task to get family and friends to understand our side of the situation. They'll beg, they'll get angry and they'll tell you you're crazy. But this is YOUR wedding and not theirs. And you have your reasons.
One of the biggest "issues" I see brides run into is that guest list. If you need some help cutting it down, our Guest List In 30 Seconds may be beneficial to you.
Now you may be trying to cut it down due to a limited budget, or you may just prefer an intimate wedding. And no matter the reason, it's good enough if you want it that way!
But I'll bet you that 9 times out of 10, there will be someone complaining about your "poor choices." And often, to your face!
It's scary, it's sad and it's a difficult situation to be in but as the bride, you need to be prepared for these circumstances before they arise. Because you're going to be the first person an angry friend or family member calls when they find out that they didn't make the cut!
So here is my advice to you:
1. Prepare guests before they find out.
If you are up front with your guests that your wedding is going to be small and intimate, and that only your immediate family will be there, then they will be far more understanding of your situation. But if you wait too long and they find out on their own, believe me, it's not going to be too fun for you!
2. Tell the truth.
The truth always finds it's way out so tell your guests the 100% truth. If you needed to make cuts because your venue is small, tell them the truth. If you just don't have the budget to support everyone you want to invite, tell them the truth. If you just want an intimate wedding and that's that, tell them the truth.
No matter the circumstance, you'll be far better off telling them the truth now, than them finding out later that you lied to their face.
3. Keep it short and sweet.
Of course, you don't want friendships to be lost so it is imperative that you put yourself in their shoes. Be kind, to the point, and understand that feelings may be hurt. But if you take the time to explain the situation and show that your truly care, those friendships will remain.
It a conversation no one wants to have, but if you feel that your decision is right, then it's right for you and you need to stand up for yourself. This is your wedding and it should be exactly as you want it. Because we all have our reasons.