Tips For Writing the Best Maid of Honor Toast

Written with love, by Josh Womack

Your character has been certified and your best friend credentials have passed. Congratulations on being Maid of Honor! You beat a lot of other women...well I should say jealous women, to have the prestigious title and when the big day comes you’ll do your best Katherine Heigl to make sure things go smoothly and efficiently.

You’ll organize the bachelorette party and go to the dress fittings, wake up at 6 AM to get your hair done, stand with great posture at the ceremony and put up with the best man who is probably married but will stay say a handful of inappropriate comments (it happens, you know it).

Now, the best man just finished his speech. He stumbled his way through a sweaty, crinkled piece of paper that was in his pocket all day and told stories of drunken debauchery when he and the groom vomited outside of Taco Bell at four in the morning. The room is weirded out, and it’s YOUR JOB to win them back. Here are three tips to a great maid of honor speech.

1) Include The Parents

A wedding day is a particularly emotional time for the parents of the bride and groom, especially the bride’s parents. That’s daddy’s little girl up there. Before getting into the meat of your speech, acknowledge the parents of the newlyweds for throwing a great party AND raising two outstanding adults. Tip: Zero in on something specific. Complement the father of the bride for taking his daughter to and from all those softball games or tell the groom’s mother that you can see where he gets his nurturing personality from. If the parents aren’t in the picture or if the relationship is shaky, find out if an aunt, uncle or grandparent had a positive effect on the upbringing. Researching this family history takes two seconds (probably could get it through text) but will be remembered for a lifetime.

2) Don’t Read Off A Piece of Paper

We all have seen this a MILLION times. Like mentioned before, the paper is crinkled and sloppy and that’s not you. You are prepared AND presentable. Right down the bullet points on 2-3 note cards and glance at them only if needed. Again, it’s a gesture that shows a method of thoughtfulness. Plus, the bride and groom can put them in their scrapbook afterwards!

3) Make an Emotional Connection

This is easy. Send a text to the bride asking for three things she loves about the groom and vice versa. Towards the end of your speech, tell the audience that you really wanted to find out why these two loved each other. When you say, “I texted both the bride and groom to find out what it was they loved about each other and this is what they said,” people will lean forward and listen….right after that statement you’ll have their attention. Say this part slowly so the bridal party and guests can really soak up the moment.

Notice that pretty much none of this is about you or how nervous you were or blah, blah, blah? Exactly.

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Laugh Staff is the first speech writing company to utilize stand-up comedians as consultants to best men and matrons of honor who are nervous about their wedding toast. Laugh Staff launched in March of 2013 and has written over 120 speeches for clients all over the world. The writers and comedians at Laugh Staff have worked for the likes of Howard Stern, Jon Stewart and Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update. Laugh Staff's mission is to minimize stress for their clients by helping them to write a toast that is heartfelt, hilarious and memorable.