Relationships fail. And for some, they seem to fail over and over and over. Is there really someone out there for me? No one ever seems to be good enough! No one ever seems to be who I am looking for and what I am looking for!
I was lucky enough to not have to go through this pain, as I married my first boyfriend. Never have I ever experienced a breakup and never have I ever experienced that feeling of "when will I ever find him??"
But for the majority of people in this world, breakups are experienced and the searching, dating, and praying continues.
Whether you are engaged or not quite there, it is important to think about the qualities in the man or woman that you have found. Your engagement is not only a time for planning your wedding, but it is a time for you to really make sure that you've found the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with. You may move in together to see what it's like to live with him or you may just spend more time together through the stress of planning, and you may go through marriage counseling as my husband and I did, to discuss the major aspects of marriage that need to be discussed.
But no matter what you are doing and how you are getting there, you need to be absolutely positively 100% sure that he is the one BEFORE you say "I Do." I've never been there, but I can imagine it is far easier to break off a wedding than it is to break off a marriage.
Make Your List
So take a moment to think about your fiancé. Write down the items that you love and write down the musts for a marriage...in your eyes. Does he/she hold all of these qualities right here, right now? I know you think you can change him/her once you are locked into marriage, but marriage is one place you shouldn't be gambling.
And if you don't know where to begin, I've started a list of some of the items I found in Frank (my husband) that allowed me to know that he was the one for me...and still is the one for me. Some of these items may be important to you and some may not be. So use this as inspiration, and create a list FOR YOU.
Your engagement is a time to think about marriage. So make sure you leave plenty of time for it.
How I Knew He Was the One...and still is
1. He tells me I am gorgeous in pajamas and no makeup...and actually believes it.
2. He can't keep his hands off of me.
3. He is far too protective because he wants to keep me safe.
4. He will do things for me that I love, even if he hates doing them.
5. He will apologize and mean it.
6. He feels my sadness and me being happy makes him happy.
7. I still get butterflies around him.
8. He shares my faith.
9. Just because I get the feeling..and I just know.