A wedding or an elopement? That is the question.

There will come a time in your engaged life, where you and your fiance just can't agree. It may be the first dance song, or it may be the food or the cake flavor, and for some of you it may come a whole lot earlier in the game...

Should we have a wedding or should we elope?

The frugal (and money-smart) side of you tells you to elope and put that money you would have spent toward your wedding on a house! But yet, society and your party side tell you, "You can always save up more money - weddings are fun and marriage is something important to share with your family and friends!"

Or maybe you are adamant on having a wedding and he is just ready to whisk you off your feet and elope already!

And this has now become the first marital discussion (or for most of you, argument) you will have together. If you can't get through something like this and come to some conclusion TOGETHER, then you can't make it through marriage.

So I've got one word for you:


Please don't give in just because you want to avoid an argument (the passive side of me does that all of the time and it's just not healthy). And don't just tell him, "because I said so." Because neither are going to get you very far.

If you lean toward the first, you may resent him for years to come and if you choose the second, he may resent you.

Not only do you need to compromise with each other, but compromise with yourself too.


What is the issue?

Maybe you can have a ceremony with all of your family and friends, and then save all of that money you would have spent on a reception and put a down payment on a house.

Or maybe you can elope now and agree that once you have purchased a house and are financially comfortable in a couple of years, you can have an anniversary celebration, renew your vows, and have the reception you always dreamed of planning.

Whatever it may be and whatever the two of you come up with together, make sure you practice compromise. Because while the practice will never make perfect, you're going to need that in your marriage...might as well start practicing early!