Musical chairs, anyone?

One of the big "tasks" toward the end of planning is dealing with your RSVP's. After calling, emailing, and texting just about every guest who was invited because no one seems to know how to use mail these days, I feel your pain. You are over it. The wedding is so close and you are just ready to be done with planning. You finally have your guest count and a sigh of relief is in order.

Now what do you do about your seating chart? Do you assign seats? Assign tables? Or just have open seating? Of course, the latter sounds spectacular right about now because dealing with a seating chart is the very last thing you want on your mind right now.

If you just don't have the time or patience for escort cards, then just make one seating chart where guests can find their table number. That isn't so bad! Although it all may seem tedious, we always recommend assigning guests to tables and letting them choose their seats from there.

10 Reasons to Assign Seating

1. What if grandma and grandpa are the last guests to the reception and there are only two seats left next to the speakers? I hope they like to party!

2. Your family is out taking photos after the ceremony and by the time they get inside, all of the "good" seats are taken. I'm pretty sure mom wants to be as close as possible to her little girl!

3. A family of five is left with a table with two remaining seats, another table with 2 remaining seats, and a third table across the room with one seat left. You're telling me the 5-year-old has to sit alone?

4. A couple is left without a table that have two seats left. And they are on opposite sides of the room. Musical chairs anyone?

5. Moving chairs and place settings around at your classy event is awkward for any guest! And for you!

6. Your wedding is about you but it's not about you. You want every guest to feel welcomed, as though they have a place, and want them all to feel comfortable. Otherwise, it's not much of a party!

7. Any divorces or bad breakups in the family? Talk about awkward when the last two seats are waiting just for them! Remember, we're avoiding drama at all costs!

8. Don't you want your guests to sit with their friends so they have the best time ever?? I don't think I need to answer this one for you.

9. Do you want to give guests meal options? Or vegetarian options? Or dietary options? Forget about it! Unless you want your wedding to seem like an auction for plates of food!

10. Or the family who saves 8 seats..."Ya can't sit here!" (quote from Forrest Gump) How sad would it be to be denied a spot at a wedding! :(


While it may seem like a pain in the butt on your end, your wedding day is about your guests too! You invited them to a beautiful night to enjoy themselves. And without assigned seating, you're not off to the best start.

If you still aren't convinced, then I'm pretty sure you'll never be!

What to Plan, When to Plan

Before you scroll down to the good part, please keep in mind that this is a very general planning timeline. It covers the main items you will need to take care of while planning but of course, you still have the small items such as favors, your guest book, decor, and so much more.

And if you're like me and are going to have a six-month engagement, no need to get overwhelmed! In my eyes, it is easier to plan a wedding in six months than it is in a year because there is no time to dilly dally and things get done and decisions are made!

So take it with a grain of salt and know that every wedding is different and this timeline will always be adjusted and customized to your needs! It is here as a reference, not as a wedding law.

Happy Planning!

I'm going to tell you a secret...

Christopher Todd Studios

Christopher Todd Studios

My very first "real" job right out of college was the Catering Sales Director at a wedding venue. We were like a wedding factory with around 130 weddings every year. Now I'm taking Tuesday weddings, Thursday weddings, Friday, two on Saturday and two weddings on Sunday. My entire life was weddings...well, it still is :)

As the Catering Sales Director of the property, I gave the tours when couples first came in at the beginning of their engagement, booked the couples who chose our venue, planned their weddings with them (yes, we coordinated too!) and was there on their wedding day to send them down the aisle! You're probably thinking, "Wow, why doesn't my venue do that?" Well before you feel like you chose the wrong venue, I will tell you now that this is very rare for a venue to act as your full-service wedding coordinator. Very very rare.

The Definition of "Coordinator"

Here is where it gets tricky...

Most venues are going to include a "coordinator" that comes along with your package when you book the venue. But what is the definition of a coordinator? The problem is that there is no one definition, and every venue has a different interpretation of this word!

The Truth of the Matter

Christopher Todd Studios

Christopher Todd Studios

The truth is that most venues do not have someone who will be coordinating your wedding and if you want a coordinator, you will have to hire someone in addition to your venue. And no, I am not saying that every venue out there is lying to you about what they are going to provide, because 99.9% of them are telling the truth! The problem is that we still haven't clarified what a coordinator does.

In the eyes of the venue:

A coordinator is someone who will be there on your wedding day to ensure the doors are unlocked, the tables and chairs are set up as you asked, and that the food is served right on time per your timeline. And if your ceremony is on site, there will generally be someone there to send you down the aisle. This all sounds great, right? Absolutely! It is so nice when a venue is able to ensure everything is done according to a timeline and everything is set up exactly as you had imagined.

All-in-all...

A venue coordinator will generally take care of everything that you have purchased or rented from them. If you rented the tables and chairs from the venue, then they will make sure they are set up! If the linens are provided by the venue, then they will be set up by the venue coordinator. And so on.

Christopher Todd Studios

Christopher Todd Studios

So what else is there?

What is missing are the items that you have not purchased or rented from the venue. The escort cards or seating chart, the favors, the additional decor, your DIY centerpieces. See where I am going with this?

If you think about it, most couples tour venues on weekends and most weddings take place on weekends. So you cannot expect your venue coordinator to be there for the entire set up of your wedding, be by your side throughout every moment of the day AND do 10 venue tours that day, right?? If only there was a way!

Just ask!

As you all know, every single venue is different. Some will fall right with my definition of a venue coordinator and some will do absolutely everything for you. But you cannot just assume that you know their definition...so ASK! Before you sign a contract, ask what items will be taken care of by the venue and which items will not. That way, there are no surprises (or tears) come your wedding day when there is no "coordinator" there to set up and you are there in your wedding dress setting favors on the tables. Sounds terrible, doesn't it??

I have seen bride after bride, upset about a venue that is no longer willing to coordinate her wedding day, according to her definition. So be safe rather than sorry and get it in writing before any contract is signed!