Today on The Bridal Boutique // "The Wedding Virus" Wedding Book

If you're planning a wedding, then you HAVE to read "The Wedding Virus" by Natalie Shell. This hilarious wedding planning book takes you through love and a your life as a bride but definitely keeps it real...and we need some more real in this world of weddings. Am I right or am I right? I don't want to give anything away but take my word for it and read this book. It's the perfect reality check to keep you grounded and to get your mind off of the little details of planning that you cannot seem to get out of your head!

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Head on over to our wedding instagram page (@theoverwhelmedbride) to enter!

wedding book // the wedding virus
wedding book // the wedding virus
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"Love & Respect"

While everyone has always told me that guys are just different than girls in what they want (or need) in a marriage, it just sort of flew by me each and every time I heard it. The pastor at my church would do a sermon on marriage to discuss these gender roles, or I would see a BuzzFeed on Facebook that had gone viral. And as I heard and read it over and over, nothing really clicked.

You're probably thinking, "I know where this is going. She is going to tell us that as soon as she got married, it clicked."

Wishful thinking, on my end. If all of that had just clicked as soon as I got married, boy would I have saved myself a lot of arguing, yelling, tears, and sadness. Because I will tell you, that it definitely doesn't just click...for anyone. And if you think it does, then you're living in a dream world!

My husband and I attended marriage classes at our church even before we got engaged (that's right, we were not even engaged!). Of course we knew that we would one day get married, but the same principles apply to all relationships, married or just dating, and don't we all want to have happy relationships? We knew we did, so that's why we went! These classes we great - we got to hear from couples who were struggling in their first year of marriage, couples who had been married for 50+ years, and couples who were welcoming their first child into the family. We learned a lot not only about others, but about ourselves and I truly believe that some of these experiences formed the foundation of our marriage.

But the idea of gender roles and what each gender really needed out of a marriage did not come until later.

My dad gave me a book called "Love & Respect" my Senior year in college. I read it, and didn't really remember much. And then once we got married, I read it again and it sure did change my view on marriage and on how I was terribly misunderstanding my husband and his needs.

I wanted one thing from him, love, and assumed that that was just human nature to want it. And he thought the same thing, but about respect, rather than love. We had each other all wrong and until I read this book and realized that I was not heading in the right direction, there was no way our marriage would thrive.

No, I am not saying that this book changed my life forever (although it did change me and my thinking significantly). But it sure was an eye opener and was the best eye opener I ever could have asked for. Our marriage is not perfect, so don't expect to get that out of it. But do expect to want to work harder and longer for a more perfect marriage.

I don't write book reviews often (and this review is not sponsored, in case you were wondering), but with how much it helped me in my marriage, I wanted to spread the word to all of my beautiful couples out there!

(Click on the book to purchase it. I am sure you can find it on Amazon and Kindle too!)

Book Review: "Hitched In A Hurry"

I had the pleasure of "meeting" a fellow author on Instagram and had the opportunity to do a book swap...my first one ever! Both authors within the wedding industry, we thought it would be fun to read each others' work, as they go hand-in-hand with each other. And it's always fun to meet new people with similar interests :)

So I went to the gym, sat on the bike, and began my journey into "Hitched in a Hurry."

Hitched in a Hurry Book Review // The Overwhelmed Bride Wedding Blog + Southern California Wedding Planner

It was a LONG gym trip, maybe one of the longest ever, but I just couldn't stop reading! So I kept on biking and kept on reading until I had completed the book, taking notes on my nifty iPhone, of course.

And then it came time for me to begin writing a book review. I'm sitting here writing away and I am already on the fourth paragraph, and haven't even said a word about the book! Yes, I'm procrastinating. And it's not because I don't know what to say, but because 1) I have too much to say and 2) I honestly don't even know how a book review works!

And so, I am going to make up my own format of a book review, whether it's right or wrong, and tell you everything I loved about "Hitched in a Hurry." Honestly, there wasn't anything I didn't like, but there were some fantastic characteristics and information in there that really stood out to me, and really meshed with what The Overwhelmed Bride is all about. So here it goes (finally)...wish me luck!


What makes "Hitched in a Hurry" so fantastic is that there is so much information in there, and yet, I didn't feel even the slightest bit overwhelmed. You know those handy dandy wedding planning binders you get all excited to buy and use? Those are the definition of overwhelming, and this book is exactly the opposite, which was fantastic! I was able to read it in one sitting, and it acts as a very precise guide that I can always refer back to...of course, if I was a bride.

Hitched in a Hurry Book Review // The Overwjelmed Bride Wedding Blog + Southern California Wedding Planner

Karley (who is the author of the book...yes, that's her on the right), includes information on what gifts to register for, timelines for planning, ceremony ideas (and not the boring ones you read all of the time), detailed questions you NEED to ask your vendors, gift ideas for the bridal part, your parents, and even your spouse (ones they'll actually love!), how to order your ceremony, a wedding program template, and even information on how to change your name after the wedding and finally my favorite, the Bridezilla Barometer.

And in addition to all of this needed information, throughout the book, she includes the stories of real life couples and personal experiences while planning her own wedding. You're not alone and it's been done before! Now that's some great inspiration if you're every feeling overwhelmed!

Isn't that fantastic? I'll answer that for you. Yes, it is. And all of that is somehow squeezed into a 115-page book! I honestly don't know how she did it, but it's all in here at just the right quantity. Perfection.

So onto a couple of my favorite topics that Karley discusses.

 

Your Vision

In order to make this work, you need to have a vision of what your wedding day will be BEFORE you begin planning. Loving anything and everything you see isn't going to get you anywhere. "You'll need the following in your bad of tricks: a clear vision for your Big Day, the ability to make quick decisions under pressure, and serious planning know-how." (16)

"It's just a dress"

Not only does this work for your dress, but for every decision you are going to be making while planning your wedding. "Yes, it will commonly be referred to as the Gown of All Gowns...but you've seen your mother's wedding portraits, right? Chances are, you wouldn't wear her dress today without some serious sleeve de-puffing and the removal of at least half of those lacy layers. Her dress wasn't magical, and yours won't be sprinkled with fairy dust either. So lose the stress and say goodbye to all that pressure to find something 'perfect'" (32)

Choosing for YOU

"He's the one who told me I couldn't get it wrong no matter what decision I made..." (47-48) You're going to see thousands of images that you love all over Pinterest. And that love will continue even after you've made important wedding decisions. You're going to choose the dress you love and then see one the next day that you may love even more. You're going to finalize your centerpieces and then see a design that is more "in" the following week. But what's done is done. You loved it when you chose it, so you'll still love it on your wedding day. And in the great words of Karley, "Regret, intruder that is, slips into your bubble of happiness and poisons your joy....Was that final sale?...And, just like you said "yes" to your fiance, make the decision to forsake all others." (33)

Pre-Marital Counseling

Whether you're religious or not, pre-martical counseling is a MUST. You wouldn't build your Ikea furniture without the directions, so how are you going to start your marriage with no guidance? You're not. This is new to you, and you're going to have no clue what to do or what to expect. So do yourself a favor and book at least a session. And if you aren't convinced, start reading at page 87 (or just start from the beginning and you'll get there) and Karley will give you plenty of reasons to see a pre-marital counselor. No sneak peeks on this one!

Save or Splurge?

We're all on a limited budget, and there are some items that may not be worth the money, despite popular belief. And this list is extremely important. While Karley gives her take on the list (a fantastic list, if I may say so myself), save on what you personally don't care about and splurge on what is most important to you! Check it out on page 76 :)

"Whatever"

And my personal favorite, the "whatever" attitude. "A zen-like state of mind that allows a Hitched in a Hurry bride to stay cool under pressure." 37) Use this not only in the midst of the craziness, but throughout life. Not everything is the end of the world!


While I have about a page more of notes on the things that I absolutely LOVED about "Hitched in a Hurry", I am going to stop there and just make you read it yourself. Whether you have a 2-month engagement or 2-year engagement, "Hitched In A Hurry" is truly a must-read. I promise...and I don't lie.

But I will leave you with one last thought...

What is a successful wedding in your eyes? "The ceremony can easily become a worship service of material things,"" (99, Taylor) and that is just not what a wedding is all about. It is about the marriage, not the event.

"A little give. A little take. And a whole lot of remembering what the Big Day is all about: marrying the guy you love." (44)

Click the book to purchase a copy!