What every bride-to-be must be prepared for...

It was the most amazing night of your life, thus far. The perfectly planned surprise proposal by your fiance was one you wouldn't trade for the world. And that ring?? It's instantly your favorite accessory...and the whole world knows it because of your seven posts in two days, sparkling from every angle. Everyone joins in the excitement..."That ring is stunning" or "You two are the cutest couple on Earth!" We've heard it all and it seems that everyone and their mother cannot wait for the wedding.

Did I say everyone? Okay, let's take a step back because we all know that not everyone is happy for the two of you.

"Someone flat out told my fiance, "That's stupid," when he told him he was engaged. And I've heard "time will tell, why bother?"" - Caitlin, bride-to-be

"I've heard "Oh buddy, it's over for you!" Like am I that bad to marry? Is my soon-to-be husband bound to be that miserable with me? And some just flat out say, "Good luck" and we just look at each other with our mouths open...in a state of slight shock." - Leyla, bride-to-be

SeaLight Photo

We've all heard similar statements and if you haven't, it's coming for you! Yes, I admit, it's all in good fun some of the time, and I have even found myself laughing along as a buddy says a similar statement to my husband. But in some cases (and you can tell), these are dead-serious statements that come out of people's mouths. And what do I think about that?? I think they are all just jealous.

"To me, it's the only wedding I'll ever have, so I want to do it big. But other people like to remind me that feelings change, and the divorce rate is high, something I do not want to hear when I am planning my wedding with the person I love most." - Caitlin, bride-to-be

They are jealous of the amazing relationship the two of you have and if you give them no reason to believe otherwise, who knows, maybe the two of you can eventually change their views on marriage. Maybe you truly can convince someone, through your relationship, that a marriage that lasts a life time is possible.

So what do I say to all of this? Show everyone that a marriage can last, through your own actions. Don't give anyone a reason to believe otherwise. If there were more marriages in this world that lasted, these statements would suddenly vanish but sadly, statistics currently back up these statements and arguments. If more people were staying together for a lifetime, then people wouldn't have reason to believe that all marriages end in divorce. So brush it off...I know, easier said than done. Just know, in your hearts, that the two of you will last a lifetime, and help others to see this potential.

"It makes me feel sad that not everyone has good thoughts about marriage. But this doesn't change my mind about it." Caitlin could not have said this more perfectly and this is a statement that I urge all of you to write down or keep logged in your brain. Yes I know, it can truly hurt sometimes to hear people say harsh things to your fiance...right in front of your face. But you two are the only ones who are going to make this relationship end in divorce...or last a lifetime.

But it is times like these that, throughout all of the negatively, make you stop and realize that not everyone is trying to bring you down. "He said that he has been married for 44 years and it is the best decision he has ever made. And he said that sees something really special in the two of us that he doesn't see in others. And he was so genuine." - Leyla, bride-to-be

And it is times like these, that bring a sigh of relief and allow you to realize that there are others who believe in you. A marriage can last a lifetime and we have proof.

Champagne Taste on A Beer Budget

Written with love, by Taylor Coelho

It’s a fact, weddings are expensive but they don’t have to burn a hole in your pocket! Here’s a story of how I saved money during a difficult time and your go to guide for saving money and coming out ahead. I hope you enjoy. Xo

What are you going to do? This was the question I got asked the most during the time my husband and I were engaged. What happened, you ask? My husband lost his job which was (to us) the least convenient thing that could have happened, we were in the midst of planning a beautiful wedding and if you don’t know me I will tell you, I’m a glam girl. I wanted all of the stops pulled out and I really wanted our guests to be wow’d! My Husband is Portuguese so that means he’s inviting everyone he’s ever met in his entire life (Just kidding) and the 2 words ‘Open Bar’ are not up for negotiation! Rest assure, this blog isn’t a “Woe is me pity party” I learnt a lot of tips and tricks on how to save money where you can while planning the wedding of your dreams and I want to share some with you. Okay enough about me; let’s get to the good stuff. Champagne taste on a beer budget, no problem!

Hire A Wedding Planner

Hiring a wedding planner will be one of the best decisions you make, it will put your mind at ease from the time he puts a ring on it until the party shuts down. When we were engaged I was not a wedding planner yet, I had planned my entire wedding, everything was done however I decided I wanted to hire a wedding planner to take care of the details I wouldn’t have time to look after on the big day. Let me tell you everything went perfect, I was stress free and I felt taken care of and that’s exactly how you want to feel on your wedding day. You can’t put a price on being stress free, organized and having someone else take care of all of the details for you. This is my biggest suggestion- even if you’re on a budget you can’t afford not to hire someone to take care of you on your wedding day and that’s exactly what we do at Pink Ivy Events!

The GQ Look

Photo by Sarah Rees, Bliss Photographic

You don’t have to spend a million bux to look like a million bux. My husband is a “Mans man” but he knows how to look good. That tie he’s sporting? Donald Trump for $10! (This was purchased at Ross in the States). His dress shirt is from Banana Republic and we purchased it at a consignment store, never been worn. $25!

Say Yes to the Dress

Photo by Sarah Rees, Bliss Photographic

I got a lot of compliments on my dress on the day of my wedding and everyone thought I spent a fortune on it. Yes, it’s designer and looks expensive however I purchased my dress from David’s Bridal in the States for $1000! It was HALF OFF!

Food and Booze

I’ll be honest (Warning, personal opinion alert!) I believe these two items should not be skimped on. You’re getting married and it’s all about you but remember at the end of the day you’re throwing a party and you want your guests to go home full and tipsy, I mean happy.

Booze-Obviously if you can afford it open bar is great but if you can’t there are creative ways to ensure everyone’s having a good time and you don’t look cheap. If you’re renting a hall/space that allows you to bring your own booze why not do a ‘wine and cheese’ theme? The vino is very inexpensive across the line; you can get a good bottle of wine for about $8.

Photo by Megan Faschoway

Food - Buffet is a great way to go and the food can be just as delicious as a fancy sit down dinner. Also consider doing a lunch menu as those cost savings are huge!

The Venue

Weddings are unique and you can get super creative nowadays! Ever consider having your reception at a trendy restaurant? What about checking out a local hall that you can dress up? These venues are just a few ideas of how you can save a lot of money and your guests will still be wow’d.

The Date

The Season- Plan your wedding during the “Off Season” from November-March, by doing so you can save a lot. How so, you ask? Well, there’s far less competition this time of year and you have more wiggle room for negotiating.

The Day- Saturday! We love you Saturday but you’re so popular. Pick a Friday or a Sunday and you’ll be saving mucho moola.

Cake

Photo by Sarah Reese, Bliss Photographic

2 words- fake cake. I know, but just hear me out; you will save hundreds of dollars by getting a real & faux cake. What this means is the top tier of your cake is real (For cutting the cake pictures) and the bottom tiers are faux, no one will know but what you will know is that you can get that glamorous cake for far less.

Photography

Do your research; interview tons of photographers to see what their price points/quality is like. Try a less expensive package, photographer’s usually base prices on the hours they work. Got a friend who’s a good photographer? Use him or her for your “Getting ready” pictures. Have your guests help out, place a disposable camera on each table and have your guests take pictures of your wedding night if you can’t afford the photographer to stay late.

I hope you have enjoyed my tips and tricks to save money, happy wedding planning! Xo

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Pink Ivy Events

Transforming Your Day From Average To Amazing

Who, What, and When to Gift

There are many times that brides wonder to what extent they need to pay for their bridal party, if at all, and what the procedure is for that. Well, that depends on the couple. I’ve known some brides who feel that since they’ve asked the girls to be in their bridal party that they need to pay for everything -  the dress, shoes, hair/makeup, travel reservations, etc. I have also known brides who will pay for a portion of the accessories, such as the jewelry and hair/makeup, while the girls pay for the rest. This all depends on budget and each couples opinion on the matter. When it comes time for me to get married, I will pay towards a portion or give the jewelry as their gift.

Wait, we have to give them gifts too?

...yes! But you should WANT to! Just like it is traditional to give the parents of the couple gifts and bride/groom gifts, it is also traditional to give the wedding party gifts as a “Thank you for supporting me on my big day!”. These are special people that are in your life. You asked them to be in your wedding for a reason, and most of the time they are paying for things on their own - Bachelor/Bachelorette parties, wedding gifts to the bride and groom, dresses and tuxedos, hair and makeup, manicures and pedicures, travel arrangements, etc. I know, there are student loans to pay for, car payments, new apartments/houses, kids, or even paying for their own wedding! However, you’ve asked them to be in the wedding party because you love them, and they love you so much that it didn’t matter to them how much they might end up splurging on your big day. You only get married once right?!

Despite the issue of money, there is also a factor of time. The people that are in your wedding party are your right-hand men and women. They are there for you to handle the drama, to encourage you and remind you why you want to marry this wonderful person in your life, to help with ideas and inspiration, to give you that tissue when you see yourself in your dress, to have late night crafting dates, and to have fun with in this wonderful journey of your engagement. Now, don’t you WANT to thank them? I won’t be able to resist gifting and saying “These are my girls! They’re awesome! Thank you!”

So now you're thinking: Okay, well, I have a tight budget, so how much do I have to spend?

Great question! The answer to this varies per couple, of course. As I mentioned earlier, it depends on your budget. One thing to keep in mind is how much the wedding party is contributing. If they’re paying for everything themselves, then it is a good idea to give a more substantial gift. If the wedding party is contributing a decent amount and they receive a small hairpiece or a cheap travel coffee mug, then it might seem like you are ungrateful. Now, I’m not saying that you need to match what they are contributing at all! We all have a budget! But, I am saying to make it special. Somewhere between the ranges of $50-$100 is good for a nice wedding party gift.

Another idea, and this is one that I will most likely do, is instead of giving a gift that they might appreciate but may never use again, give them the gift of lighting the financial load of being in your wedding party. This would be good for when the costs are starting to really add up. Paying for their hair, makeup, dress, travel expenses, etc. are equally as valuable as giving a gift.

Christopher Todd Studios

If you have decided that you would like to pay for most of the accessories and expenses involved in being in the wedding party, then you don’t need to spend as much on a gift, if you give a gift at all. It’s always nice to receive a small token as a Thank You, though, and this could be a bracelet with their initials, personalized cufflinks, or customized shot glasses for a pre-ceremony toast!

And don’t forget about Mom and Dad! Most of the time, they are contributing a majority of the finances toward your wedding, whether they’re paying for the whole event or not. In addition to finances, they are right there besides you giving input and helping you plan your big day! They have been there for you throughout your entire life and as you start a family of your own it is the perfect opportunity to give them a token of your appreciation. I know, I know, you can never repay them right? I completely agree. But surely, a small token of your appreciation can't hurt.

Okay, I can’t wait to give them the gifts I’ve chosen for my wedding party! When can I give them?!

There is no right or wrong time to give out your gifts! Typically, they are given as close to the wedding date as possible. So this could be at the rehearsal dinner in front of everyone while you give a toast, or privately while everyone is getting ready - it’s up to you! 

Remember, there is no set amount, there is no set time, and there is nobody who will judge how much you gave or didn’t give. Don’t worry, you’re wedding party is there to support and love you and, of course, would not have said yes if it were otherwise. If you’re worried about what they might say about your gift then do you really want them in your wedding party to begin with? Just have fun with it and I promise it will all turn out great!