Our pastor was fantastic at counseling us before marriage. We talked about finances, about our goals for the future, and he made us speak about some "issues" that were slowly tearing us apart (or though it seemed at the time). And for those of you in the process of planning your marriage, I would highly recommend going to some counseling to prep you for some of the more difficult times you are going to encounter together in years to come.
I know it sounds a bit scary when worded like that, but with the lows come the highs. And you're going to have the most memorable times of your life with your spouse. You thought a night out in college was fun? Get ready for the time of your life!
That is, if you make the most of it. You have the decision to start your new life together happy, or fighting for what you (as a single person) think you should have. We are selfish beings by nature so joining forces and joining beliefs is hard enough. But marriage is what you make of it.
And so, I've come up with the top things I wish I had known before marriage, to share with all of you.
- At the end of each day, you have nowhere to go other than your own bed...together.
- Even when you're the most mad at him, the only way to feel better is to be in his arms.
- Sometimes you have to admit you’re wrong, even when you aren’t.
- Apologize and don’t just say it...mean it.
- Don’t let finances tear you apart – it’ll all work out as long as you're together.
- You won’t always get it your way, but find a way to see it in his eyes. Make his way, your way.
- Compromise not because you have to, but because you want to.
- Give it all you have, even if he isn't. You can only control your own actions.
- Boys forget things...a lot. Remember, we are chemically different.
And if all else fails, remember the moment you knew you were in love. Re-live it all over again and those things that seem so terrible in the moment, will quickly fade away.
We are in this for the long rung and it’s far better to be happy for a long time than sad, angry, and spiteful for a short time. Take your pick!